A Feminist watches Love Island: episode 2 & 3 - Lucie is not a prize to be won

On Episode two and three, Dancer Curtis and boxer Tommy have to pick a woman to couple up with.

The power is in their hands! In an extreme version of the traditional dating model, the men get to pick the woman they like while the woman subtly try to influence a decision they have no real power over. Not much multural consent going on.

Curtis talks to Yewande and Amy, we are meant to believe he is trying to decide between the two of them but the cynic in me knew he would, of course, pick Amy.

Curtis is playing the sweet card but he comes across as a bit calculating urging Tommy to get to Lucie by picking Amber. The old "using another woman to get the one you really want to like you" game, not very sweet behaviour.

Then there is Tommy and Lucie. Everyone fancies Lucie. Is it because she is beautiful, interesting and cool? Or is it because the men see her as price to fight over in a test of their manliness?

Tommy “steals” Lucie from Joe in the not so shocking recoupling. Then everyone spends Episode three pandering to Joe’s feelings about having a woman he barely knows "stolen". Because apparently it's all about him.

The emotional labour Lucie has to take on as she repeatedly 'chats' to Joe about how he feels! Even I felt exhausted.

He never asks her how she feels about the situation or asks her if she is ok because he is too busy nursing his ego. It’s not like she now has to sleep in the same bed as a man she doesn’t fancy (though thankfully that doesn't happen). Joe spends the whole of Episode three guilt tripping and emotionally manipulating Lucie until she cries, how romantic. Dump him Lucie.

Lucie says “I did make it obvious in the nicest way (that I didn’t like Tommy)”, because women must reject men with a smile on their face so they don’t hurt their ego. Every rejection must be nice, the undertone here is that woman fear men’s reaction when they reject them. In the dating world, women are often met with violence from men they reject so we reject “in the nicest way” to protect ourselves from that possibility.

Everyone manages to find a way to blame Lucie for Tommy’s choice to pick her. Joe acts like she walked out on him. Amber says she “must have said something to make him pick her”.

We don’t know if she did and maybe she does like Tommy. But right now it comes across as everyone holding Lucie to an impossibly high and unrealistic standard of loyalty. This is phenomena we see across the dating landscape, when men and women judge women's disloyal actions more harshly than men. It is expectable for men to have a “wandering eye” or to flirt with other women but woman must pick one man and never look else where.

Even on a show where that is the entire point.

Even when she hasn't had an choice in the matter.

Even when she isn't in a relationship. 

Even when it has been TWO DAYS.

Why is everyone so invested already?!

Tommy told Lucie he wouldn’t pick her if she wasn’t interested but he still did. It is clear he feels an entitlement to “explore” his feelings for her even if he doesn’t know if she shares them. Joe feels hurt by Lucie’s “rejection” (even though she hasn’t rejected him, yet), he feels entitled to Lucie’s entire attention and a lot of emotional labour from her to reassure him. Despite the fact that they are not a couple, they have kissed once. These are two good example of how male entitlement plays out in the dating game. I am sure we see a lot more of this in upcoming episodes.

I enjoyed how much everyone said “he is a good guy” about Tommy and Joe, do they think if they say it enough it will become true? Also how the hell does anyone know who is good, it’s been TWO DAYS?! 

Anton says “I don’t understand women” then suggests lying to a woman, maybe that’s why you don’t understand them Anton? Anton is not a good guy.

Special shoutout to Amber for seeing the red flags with Joe, she fast becoming my favourite for her no bullshit attitude and ability to see exactly what everyone is up to.

Let’s hope next episode Lucie tells Joe to do one, Tommy chills out and actually tries to get to know Lucie as a person and Anton gets kicked out.